LIGHT AND LIFE CHANGES

I Love You 

   There is not one space on my desk to safely place a bottle of water, or a coffee cup. It is covered with 2 monitors, a lamp, papers, files, a clock, medicine, a piece of sapphire, a fish, (not a real one), books. Books I have read. Books I haven’t read. Books with sticky notes marking a passage. As I sort through files I haven’t opened or added to in years, I get lost in the past. But I’m doing this for my future even though I just want to go to sleep. It is a blessing to be inside sheltered from the heat. This is work that I can do sitting down. It all must be done. It was not in my plan for the day but often our plans change, and we can no more go back and make things different than we can stop the sun rising.

     As I pick up books, I always open them. I remember where and when I brought most of them home to live with me. Now I must decide if they will stay with me. When we were packing to move from Maine to Oklahoma – there were 2 attics, a loft, a barn and the house of course. We had to decide what to keep, what to give away. It would have been much easier to leave it all, except the dogs.

     Oklahoma did not work as we had imagined. Again, we had to decide. Now, there is only me to decide. When going through some boxes in the garage yesterday, I discovered things I had been looking for since we moved here. Bruce had made use of every space--inside a ceramic cask was a painted flowerpot and the bottom of the pepper grinder. I laughed. I remembered him walking about the house looking for the right shape of a thing to fill a certain space. If Bruce was still here, we would not be sorting or packing to move to Maine. Light and life changes by the moment.

PHOTO: LJ Austin “Sold” 2024